The Java Server

From Javaserver Wiki

[edit] The Java Server, TF2 Edition

Running: TeamFortress 2

Max players: 18

IP: 217.163.25.165:27015

Owner: Javaguy

[edit] History

In the beginning, there was nothing. Then Valve came and they released the sequal to a popular online game. And they saw that it was good.

On the second day, PC Gamer UK saw that all the awesome folks needed a server to play on, and so PCG Server was born. And for a while, it was good.

But then came the time of TF2 updates and the Slothful Server Admin. And thus PCG was down a lot when people wanted to play, and so the people saw that it was not good.

So came Javaguy, and said "Lo, I have rented a small TF2 server for our use!" And so the people rejoiced.

"But what do we call this place?" was mused, til someone cried "The Java-Server!" and all but Java saw that it was good.

Soon Java cried "Our budding community is great indeed, but may be undone by gameserver's greed." And thus a brave few stepped forth, to provide the finances to maintain the Server. And for a time, it was good.

Then came the time of the Unlocks. And there was much trepidation over medic spam and much discord among the populace.

Then came the time of succession. Java, overworked and underpaid, retired from his lofty position of power, handing the reigns to the one they call Minus. And Minus said "Lo, I shall make us the greatest community on this fair web!" and for a time it was so.

Then came the time of the Pyro unlocks. The fear of achievments returned, and firey doom spread throughout the land, and the people cowered for fear of the flames.

Then came the time of the Bannings, and Minus gradually came to wield his power like a tyrant, and it was not good. He spurned the oldest and wisest of the people, and favoured only those who lined his pockets, and there was much discord and strife, and some of the people were outcast into the desert.

Then came the return of Java. His new server meant no offence, but a careless act of naming caused a great schism. Minus took umbridge to the use of the name "Independance Play", believing it to be a personal attack and threat to his power. And Bad Words were exchanged, and Minus pulled down his temple and entered the desert in self-imposed exile.

The people were both saddened and uplifted. The loss of one leader was bad, but the return of the First King was cause for celebration. And so in celebration the people played Resovoir and dasbooty, and they saw that it was ok but needed some balancing.

Soon after, so it seemed, came the time of the Heavy unlocks. And the people were cheered by the great Sandvich and new maps, and they saw that it was good, except for arena which was a bit rubbish really.

Then came a time of great sorrow. Great man named Lukasa of J-Server was travelling to a land without proper Steam access. And he turned to the people and said "Do not weep, for one day I shall return, but for a while we must part." and the people were saddened.

By now the name of J-Server had spread far and wide. And so Java was made a great offer. He turned to the people and said "Lo! Six of our finest warriors must join a grand tournament with the chance to win fabulous prize money!" And six stood and said "I shall go!"

And the team entered the Showdown and said "Ah, we shall win with laughter!" And so Hoedowns were had and tauntkills were made. And so was won a bounty of 300 coins each, which the Six never recieved.

And so all was well in the land of J-Server, until came the time of the Zombie. And for a while, J-Server stood empty.

And so the people said "Let us arrange games from time to time to keep the server alive!" And it was so. And then Valve returned and said "Lo! Soon we will bring new contents!" and the people rejoiced, for TF2 had not died yet.

[edit] Testimonials

Just listen to these great testimonials from some of our users:

"win"

"epic"

"A bit gay."

"OMG Mic Spam!"